Some people feel that they have lost control after a setback in their lives. Perhaps they believe that they have little chance of getting a good job because of poor school performance or through injury or illness. Whatever the reason, they feel that life has dealt them a raw deal.

Maybe it has but if those people want to live the rest of their lives rather than just exist, they have to have the courage to do something about taking back control.

Either you are in control of your life or you are letting outside factors and other people run your life. If you complain that something or someone is preventing you from getting on with your life, then you are admitting that this is what is in control.

Some people seem to take a perverse enjoyment out of being a victim. They are not in control. They are allowing outside influences to push them around.

If you don’t want to be a victim, you have got to make your own escape. You can – and perhaps should – seek help but it must be you who is the driving force.

The first step is to accept the fact that whatever it was has happened. Until this is accepted, no progress can be made. It is difficult to see the doors of opportunity opening in front of us if we are continually looking back at the door that has closed behind us. “OK so it’s happened and now it’s up to me to make the best of it.”

The next step is to work out what is the best future to work towards. Use Unit 2 to identify a future that is not only possible but also satisfying. Set high but achievable goals and then have the courage to strive towards them.

It may not be easy. But the struggle and the achievements you make along the way will be hugely satisfying. All of a sudden, life will be great once again, not because you are back where you once were – that may never happen. It will be because you feel in control once again.

Between the ages of 13 and 22, Pauline Vetuna struggled with a serious medical condition that required on-going treatment and surgery to her spinal cord. After one operation, Pauline suddenly found herself paralysed from the waist down. She suffered a month of misery and then she took control. She realised that what had happened had indeed happened and there was nothing she could do to change the situation. She also realised that she was alive and that she wanted to live, not just to exist. She stopped looking back at what she had once hoped her life would be like and started to look forward to a future, the best possible future she could have. She is now pursuing a writing career and hopes to break into scriptwriting.

You may not be responsible for the events that threaten your future. You may be a victim of bad luck. But you are responsible for the way you react to that bad luck. You, too, will get a lot of support if you show the determination to get back on top.

The choice is yours: either accept what has happened and make the best of the rest of your life, or continue to be a victim.

Either way you are responsible; responsible for your own life management or responsible for allowing yourself to be pushed around, a victim of your own lack of courage and determination.

Which is it to be?